The Asylum is back at it again, and this time they’re slithering straight into giant snake territory. The studio has released the trailer for The Anacondas, a painfully obvious riff on the Anaconda film franchise amd it leans hard into cheap thrills, bad CGI, and gloriously dumb monster mayhem.
I guess, if you’ve ever had a soft spot for these trashy Asylum movies, that know exactly what they are, this one’s probably already on your radar.
The Asylum has spent the year pumping out knockoff-style releases to line up with bigger studio movies, and with Sony gearing up its own Anaconda remake for Christmas, this one was inevitable.
The setup is exactly what you’d expect. A group of explorers venture deep into ancient Mexican ruins and uncover evidence of a long-lost civilization obsessed with snake worship.
Things go sideways fast when they accidentally awaken a massive anaconda that’s been dormant for centuries. Starved of human sacrifices and apparently powered by bad decisions, the snake starts growing bigger, hungrier, and angrier by the minute. Subtlety isn’t on the menu.
Here’s the official synopsis:“An Anaconda riff. Archaeologist explorers in Mexico uncover the ruins of an ancient snake-worshiping civilization. Celebration turns to horror when they awaken an ever-growing anaconda, starved of human sacrifices for centuries. Now, the team must band together to survive.”
The movie is directed by Marcel Walz, who’s been cranking out genre fare for years and already delivered Pretty Boy and Jurassic Reborn earlier this year.
The trailer is ridiculous and cheap. The CGI snake looks absurd, the dialogue sucks, and I continue to be baffled by the fact that people spend money on making this crap.
The Anacondas is now playing on VOD. If you’re in the mood for a bad giant snake movie, then here ya go!
