Photo: Emma Bauso
With the help of a few basic tips and guidelines, however, you can protect your children throughout the divorce. Let’s look at a few of the more effective things to do.
Prioritise Open and Honest Communication (Age-Appropriate)
Children will be able to sense when something is going on. This uncertainty can lead them to form their own conclusions, which might be mistaken and even damaging.
While you don’t need to give a blow-by-blow account of every moment of the process, you will need to be consistent and clear about what matters. Reassure them that they are not to blame for what’s happening, and that the divorce won’t mean that their parents will no longer love them in the future.
Maintain Routines and Stability
Avoid Conflict in Front of the Children
While some divorces are more amicable than others, it’s fair to say that raised voices and bickering are common during a divorce. Make sure that you set aside time to air your feelings, so that they don’t end up spilling out in front of the children.
Open hostility can be a source of great distress, especially for children who don’t fully understand the issues in play.
Create a Co-Parenting Plan
Getting good results for your children, in many cases, means developing a structured plan for their care. This will take the form of a binding document known as a Parenting Plan. It will outline exactly how you intend to raise the child in question, and its contents can be used to resolve disputes later on.
By collaborating on a parenting plan, you’ll send a clear message to your child that you remain committed to the project of their upbringing, even if you’re not romantically involved with one another.
Encourage Emotional Expression
If your child feels comfortable expressing their emotions, and they’re able to do so in a healthy way, then they might be much more likely to cope with the chaos around them. What’s more, you might be advised of problems, so that you can intervene and help with them.
Final Thoughts…
This journey takes immense courage and resilience, but by focusing on their needs, you can truly minimize distress and help them adapt to a new, loving family dynamic. You’ve got this, and more importantly, your children have you.
